Just don't get it

I cannot for the life of me understand people who are cruel to animals. Despite my patience and willingness to let people be people, quite honestly, I've wracked my brain on the matter and I truly cannot think of any acceptable excuse for a person inflicting unnecessary pain or suffering on an animal. If I came across such a person, he or she would be immediately on my shit-list...which I guess isn't much of a threat...but still!

Granted, this might be hypocritical of me to take this stance. I'm sure a long and lengthy lecture from a vegan about the non-consent of animals being milked is being composed specifically for me right now, or perhaps some commentary from an animal rights activist informing me that my implicit acceptance and consumption of meat-packing industry's products is, in essence, animal cruelty....but whatever. On a basic level, what I'm trying to say is that the way someone treats (not eats) a living animal speaks volumes about character. I don't get people that beat dogs, torture cats. I don't really get people that hunt excessively for sport, for the purpose of mounting dead animal heads on walls. I don't get the people lounging on the Alaskan cruise ship who see a humpback whale for the first time and casually say, "I'd love to hunt that." I understand it, but...I just don't get it. 

I bring this issue of animal cruelty up (is it even an issue...?) because a few nights ago, while Squeeze was running around in the backyard barking, some asshole hipster kids pepper-sprayed him in the eyes. Who pepper sprays a dog that's barking behind a fence!? Now, Squeeze is not some young dog with virile jumping abilities. What he is, is a frowsy old man who was barking at some drunken creepers creeping down a dark alley at 3 AM. It infuriates me that even after chasing these people down (they were laughing at what they had done!), there's literally nothing that can be done, not even an apology received. Poor dog. Squeeze's cornea pretty much almost burned off, according to the vet, and he was on antibiotic and steroid treatment for a few days because his eye was so irritated. What terribleness is this? Why do so many people people suck so hard?

So maybe it's wrong of me to post a "meat" dish after this raging anecdote on animal cruelty, but hey! we made Cornish game hens! And stuffed lemons in them!

Pinky liked these a lot more than I did. Here's the link to the theme though. I don't know, I don't "get" Cornish game hens either. They just taste like small chickens. Small moist chickens, but I mean, chicken! Is this a dish for people who don't like to share a whole bird or something? Why do people love game hens so?

Moroccan Cornish Game Hens

serves 2 

2 Cornish game hens

for the stuffing

1 handful fresh cilantro, roughly chopped

6 TB green or kalamata olives, liquid reserved

6 TB pickled lemon*

4 cloves smashed garlic

2 lemons

freshly ground black pepper

for the rub

6 cloves garlic, minced into a paste

1 teaspoon salt

1/4 C olive oil

2 teaspoons Hungarian paprika

1 teaspoon ground turmeric

1 teaspoon cumin

1 teaspoon ground coriander

1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper

1/2 teaspoon chili powder

*Note: I bought a jar of pre-spiced pickled lemons from the Punjabi market. 

Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Rinse and thoroughly dry the hens - having a dry hen will insure that the spice-rub sticks. Place the two hens into a large baking dish and ensure that they each have their own personal bubble (no overcrowding) so that they can roast evenly and acquire some crispy skin.

In each game hen, spoon in a few teaspoons of olive juice and rub evenly over the cavity, as evenly as possible. Pepper the cavities of the hens as well. Then, stuff with 2 smashed cloves of garlic, ~2 TB of pickled lemons, ~3 TB of olives (use the real ones, don't skimp here!), and 1/2 the cilantro. The bird should be near full. Stop the cavity gap with 1 lemon, and secure the lemon in place with toothpick or two. 

Mix together the garlic paste and salt, divide in half, then rub under the skin of the hens. These suckers will be garlicky (if you don't like that, just reduce the amount of garlic you use). Then, mix together the remaining spices and whisk together with the 1/4 C of olive oil. Using your hands, rub this mixture all over the outside of the two hens until both hens are evenly and thickly coated.

Bake at 375 for ~1 hour, or until juices run clear. At that point, remove from oven, loosely tent with foil, and let rest for 15 minutes. Then it's ready to serve! Easy peasy pumpkin squeasy.