In preparation

Brown soup. Or tan. Needs some color, he says, something brighter. A prettier bowl or something green. I guess it could use some parsley. 

I'm at the end of a long day and per usual, my introverted tendencies dominate and I've crawled back into my dark hovel to brood and prepare for an imminent exam, which by all means will most likely sweep me away into some state of danger and depression by noon tomorrow. Of course, burrowing down into my warren "to study" is, in all actuality, just another excuse to mask my isolation from the world of people outside the apartment door. Really, I'm not quite sure what happened to that lively, witty extrovert in me. I haven't seen him since 2011. 

To return to the subject at hand though, of imminence and exams, it seems that everything in my life has reverted back to the "preparative" state. Getting ready for the practical next week, drilling preps for lab later in the week, studying for multiple exams ahead of time, writing essays and abstracts for future applications, setting up meetings with professors about my life, trying to maintain some semblance of "good" grades to keep my future opportunities for residency specialization open. Basically, attempting do things today so that I can be, mentally, relatively far from death's door tomorrow. Insert heaving sigh here. Honestly, from the looks of  things, it seems as if I've forgotten what it's like to live in the present. And yet, what's probably more true is that I had been living in the present for so long, prior to this past year, that my mind, at first, didn't even comprehend what it was like to return to living in the past again.

Sorry. I'll set the heaving sighs and convoluted writing aside. I know it's not always the best to read about darker things here on the blogosphere, and I appreciate you readers bearing with me. It's just that there are just far too many motivational quotes on the social media machine these days, from your peers or from complete strangers, all which usually encourage self-indulgence, self "love," and "carpe diems" galore. I don't quite understand this phenomena. Yes, happiness can bring people together, but happiness is not the default primary human condition through which we all connect. If I were to be truly frank, I would tell you that people bond best through difficult situations, through misery, and to pretend otherwise is a bit of a big fat lie. In my case, any awareness of my immediate surroundings only fills me with turbid feelings of frustration, comic disbelief, tiredness, and the occasional bout of despair. So why pretend? I'd rather ignore the Facebooky Twittering calls of #BeHappies, and stay catatonic, a little numb. It seems safer, mentally, to just prepare. Hibernate, avoid conflict, heal that throbbing keloid. 

And so, in line with the theme, here is a preparative recipe. Cream of "blank" soup, or as subsequently follows, cream of mushroom and broccoli soup. If you'd like a singular version, you can choose to omit either the former or the latter in the recipe. This is a "preparative" recipe in the sense that cream of "blank" soups are usually just components in other recipes (e.g. green bean casserole). In fact, I'm not really familiar with anyone that just has a bowl of cream of mushroom soup on its own....but this is certainly a probable and possible situation. If so, this soup is hearty enough to stand on its own, maybe with a crusty slice of bread on the side and something...green.

Cream of Mushroom and Broccoli Soup

2-3 quarts

24 oz sliced button mushrooms

16 oz broccoli, chopped

6 cloves garlic, minced

4 ribs celery, minced

2 yellow onions, minced

2 teaspoons salt

1/2 teaspoon dried thyme

1 TB olive oil

1 C red wine

5 TB unsalted butter

1/3 C all purpose flour

1 C cream

32 oz. chicken broth

black pepper, to season

Note: I used (defrosted) frozen broccoli crowns, a chianti for the red wine, and minced the aromatics in a food processor. 

Heat olive oil in a large pot on medium heat, until the oil is shiny and slick. Then add in the sliced button mushrooms, a teaspoon of salt, dried thyme, minced garlic, celery, and onions. Stir the mixture and adjust heat to medium-low. Cook for 15-20 minutes, stirring occasionally to avoid burning, or until mushrooms are browned in color and dry. Then add in chopped broccoli and red wine. Simmer all of this until the wine is reduced and there is very little liquid left in the pot (the broccoli will also give off a good amount of liquid, so don't be too surprised if you have more liquid than you'd expect). After the wine has reduced, transfer this mushroom-broccoli-wine mixture from the pot into a large bowl and let cool while you prepare the roux. 

Return the same large pot to the stove and on med-high heat, melt the unsalted butter and remaining teaspoon of salt. Once the butter is melted, sprinkle in the flour while stirring vigorously with a spatula or wooden spoon, to avoid the flour clumping. Cook the roux until it looks glossy, then drizzle in the 1 C of cream while simultaneously stirring, also to avoid clumping. When the cream and butter are smooth, pour the chicken broth as well as the mushroom-broccoli-wine mixture back into the pot, mixing until everything is evenly distributed in the soup. 

Simmer for another 20 minutes or more, until the soup has thickened to the desired consistency. Once ready, season liberally with black pepper, taste, and season with more salt if necessary. You can serve immediately or store away for use in other recipes.